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The Art of Fine Metalwork and the Art of Empathy and Nonviolent Communication- woven together for you....

Thursday, June 10, 2010

I can't believe this I've been stood up!-challenge day 3

I can't believe this I've been stood up! Well not really, because it was an emergency and he had to go see to his ailing Mom, but still talk about disappointment!
This has been a crazy day, such a build-up, wind-up any name you can think of. Woke up at 430 am and couldn't fall back asleep so went to write my 800 words which turned into 850...and enjoyed it thoroughly.
Bummer! Would've gone to another Yoga class at 1815 but missed it because of this drink that didn't happen. Man!! (my daughter aged 10 loves to say that)..well that kinda softens my heart when I think of her. Whenever I think of Yasmin and Tom, my twins, my heart softens , I bet it does for you Moms too!
Ok so where was I. Blah, I don't feel inspired to write now. Yesterday I was riding on a cloud 'cause I had just come back from giving a talk on Empathy to a group of horseback riding trainers. What a fantastic bunch! All in their 20's. I tell you - there is, there IS a shift in consciousness (I'll never get the spelling of that word right, thank God for spelling check!) So, yes. there is a shift and why am I saying this, it's because, when I asked. what is Empathy to them, almost all of them came up with beautiful answers. One girl said that when you empathize with someone you help that person  find within him/herself that certain feeling or quality. It is a gift
Ah, sinking feeling now in my heart. All day I was excited, tired, day dreaming, you name it, waiting for this date, even went to get my eyebrows plucked so I could be prettier. So what now? I'm going back to reading the diary of Etty Hillesum, a young Jewish Dutch woman who wrote her diary in the midst of World War 2, and guess what she was writing about? Not about politics, but about her own personal journey, her own self development...it's fascinating. Yes that's it I'm going to read more and get back to writing this later...Bye (about 400 words left
Oh bother, oh brother who can read at a time like this and a fairly heavy diary at that! What am I a masochist? Well in a sense , yes, Here I was , or here I am about to embark on some affair, well I'm not sure because it was a first date, but there I was about to get into something which I don't know how I would get out of because sisters, he's in a relationship, this guy. And yet there's something about him, the way he listens,even through a chat or an e-mail, what a quality, how attractive is that?

Looking for photographs to add to these posts I found this one of a beautiful day at the beach in Tel Aviv, in Febuary, when I was at a Biosynthesis workshop led by the one and only Esther Frankel. 
Well for many of you it means nothing, and why should it? What is Biosynthesis anyway. Body oriented psychotherapy where every conceivable and known part of us, i.e. mental, emotional, physical, in movement, standing sitting, structured points of touch, breath, all come together in therapy. For me, it's been revolutionary. You know, I've been in therapy many times, all of them great with people, who have been dear,dear guides on my path, but I am experiencing change on a cellular level here. From the perspective of biosynthesis , and not only, we were feeling absorbing people way before language came in and that means from the moment we were conceived and I mean embryology here folks.Our experiences started as minute old zigots, to the journey down the fallopian tubes , implantation in the womb, and the following weeks of development are crucial. Not to mention what was going on in Mom's life during our pregnancy, her mental, emotional well being, through our birth and early infant and childhood, and how our early needs were met, or not. As the case was with me , and many many more people .Our basic trust. Deep breath...I've become aware of my body, my energy, my grounding, or lack of in a way that I never experienced before!. My Yoga practice is different,  and my levels of contentment with myself are slowly, but surely rising. I am befriending Yael, yes that's it. Making friends with who I am, expressing my Self more. which leads to moving forward with my Teaching Empathy, deciding to give myself a break from metalwork which has defined me for so long, starting to paint Mandalas, hey does Bindu know that her name is the center point and beginning of each Mandala? .S
Suddenly a phone call, and he's on his way! The date is happening folks, sisters....getting nervous and excited. Till tomorrow.....

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